Rare is the person who enjoyed writing definitions in school. I know I didn’t care for it. The whole thing just seemed so tedious. It felt almost like a punishment, something akin to writing sentences on the chalkboard. But vocabulary is a foundation for pretty much every subject. No matter what you study you won’t get out of learning new definitions.
What really bothers me is the old definitions.
The uncommon words are easier to define, I think, because you use a lot of common words to define them. But the very basic words are tough. As an example just try to define the extremely common word “the.” That’s hard to do isn’t it? Everyone knows what that word means and everyone uses it all the time. But coming up with a definition? It isn’t easy.
Here’s another one for you: Love. What does “love” really mean? If you are going to be in any way involved in religion you need to know what that means. But how many definitions of the word “love” do you think you would get if you asked 100 people to describe it? I think you would get quite a few.
The most quoted scripture in the bible is about love. I believe it got to the number one status due to its nearly ubiquitous use in weddings. It comes from 1 Corinthians and I bet you know it well.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
Why do you think this would be used in so many weddings? Why do the bride and groom need to be told what love is? Don’t they already know? And what about this definition? If this is really something that the newlyweds are to adopt then aren’t we setting the bar too high? Who can live up to that standard?
Here’s what I think. We have it all wrong. That scripture isn’t about the bride and groom. There is no way Paul wrote that with a mind for future weddings. He is describing something else besides a template for matrimonial bliss. This scripture is about God’s love. God’s love does all of those things Paul says.
Notice the first two things love is described to be. The first is patient. I have noticed that patience is in short supply lately. I used to have a pen pal. You know what that is right? There is a person from far away who actually writes a real letter to you. You get it in the mail, read it, and then respond by writing your own (real) letter. What a concept! I had to wait a few weeks before I got any response to my letter. And I didn’t mind at all. That just made it something to look forward to.
Maybe people still have pen pals but I haven’t heard of it in a while. I don’t know that many people would have the patience for it anymore. We are used to instant responses from others on our phones and computers.
What about film developing? Remember how long that used to take? We waited for days to see the pictures we had taken. Now you see them as you take them. Who would buy a phone today that made you wait a few days before you saw the pictures it took?
Not having patience leads to frustration. I am sure you can see how bad this can be in a relationship. What if you had no patience with the ones you love? What if the ones you love had no patience with you? Love takes time to grow, but impatience and time are bitter enemies.
Having patience means giving someone (or yourself) time to learn and grow. You make mistakes and correct them. You figure out what works in a relationship and cultivate the things that make love really grow.
God has patience. Imagine if God didn’t. What would most of the stories in the bible have been like if God showed no patience? Would Moses have gotten anywhere? Would Abraham have recovered from his disastrous trip into Egypt? Would Paul have become a Christian at all?
The second thing love is described as is kind. Kindness makes you a better person. When you think about this you know it is true. The problem is we don’t think about this enough. Kindness makes you and the people around you happier. It lowers your blood pressure. It makes people (including you) feel good. And kindness is contagious. Many people respond to kindness with other acts of kindness. Try it and you will see how contagious it is.
God’s love is patient. God’s love is kind. God’s love is the standard for our love. So let us be patient and kind toward each other. Let’s get as close to that standard as we can. That is when we will really see what love is all about.
God Bless